After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize