Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
