Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
