the new term for farting is butt boxing.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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