It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize