we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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