In the future we'll all be gay
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
