On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
