I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Help. Why am I so naked?
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