And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
