oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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