The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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