Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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