yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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