Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
