i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Mom said you looked used
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
