Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
