I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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