i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
