thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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