why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
