3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
