i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
