Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
