i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
