I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Come share oat with me in your robe
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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