Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
there was a trapeze. enough said
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
