69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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