How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
