All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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