So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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