i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
