sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
now i know why i became what i already was.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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