I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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