The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
