you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
