I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize