the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize