He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
