you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
