Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
