I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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