Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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