Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My pussy is not your playground.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
