i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
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