She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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