How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize