Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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