so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
