Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize