I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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