hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
i out mim tonsoeep
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